Which box do you live in? None is the right answer. However, “Software Engineer” is the box I would check. Maybe writer, maybe stoic philosopher, certainly son and brother (lover on a good day), but definitely not ‘None’. All these things is what people see when they see me. What do people see when they see you? And what do I mean when I ask, what box do you live in?
A box is a finite amount of space encapsulated by four corners and six sides - is that what you are, a limited human (sorry aliens) incapable of being anything that is outside your box? You see this a lot I’m sure, “Oh no that’s Stacey’s job, sorry, I don’t do that”. Perhaps you’ve said something like this before to your boss or coworker. All you did there was limit yourself to the constraints of your box. You prevented your box from blowing up one of its sides. You prevented your brain from reconstructing what it means to be you. Imagine if you had said instead, “Oh that’s usually Stacey’s job but suure I have the bandwidth… I’ll get right on it”. Your boss surely would’ve been impressed. Now I’m not saying don’t establish boundaries and be taken advantage of by Stacey’s bad habit of taking long ass lunch breaks. What I’m saying is, do not limit yourself in what you are capable of being and doing. Imagine that by doing Stacey’s work for a hot second you bump into someone that becomes the love of your life, or, you start singing your favorite tune and a music producer says “Daang girl, you can sing, hit me up” or whatever incredible opportunity you only dream of. Imagine that in the moment you decided to get outside your comfort zone life/the universe/God says, “Oh shit, I see you son”, and, BOOM your whole life changes in the blink of an eye. All because you said yes when your box wanted you to say no.
Your box will always want to keep you enclosed by it’s warmth, like a saturated “I love you” from a desensitized lover, it’s the path of least resistance. People too will always want to keep you in a box. It’s a survival thing — our brains are constantly inundated by information coming from our senses that by making patterns, categorizing and generalizing the information our brains alleviate some of the processing power and decision making from an essay question to a multiple choice question. “Yeah that’s safe to eat” or “No don’t go there” — it’s easier for the electrical impulses in your brain to travel through the existing neural links than it is to establish new ones. Think of it as river, you can either go with the flow (lazy river anyone?) and float downstream or fight the current and swim up the river (like a salmon!). I know what you're thinking, you’re now picturing yourself floating down a river on a perfect day with a hot hombre serving your margaritas and another feeding you grapes, but entertain me and fight the urge and the temptation for the easy way out. Imagine if that one salmon had never decided to go up that river to lay its eggs; would we know to enjoy the scrumptious fattiness that is a poached salmon? Probably not.
Realize that we live in a world that is made up from decisions that were made in the past. Decisions that were made by people, like you and I, that fought the urge to stay in their lane and do as they’re told. People that said, “No man fuck that shit I’m going over there y’all are crazy” (or am I crazy?). What makes you any different than them? Physically not much right; two legs, two arms, a nose, a brain. Mentally though… (not that different right? cause you’re now all inspired and fired up right? go you)
The box is your comfort zone and it takes courage to break out of it. And the truth is that you have all the courage you need to break the ceiling that makes up your box and expand how much space it provides for you to live in. You just need to choose. You are capable of anything and everything your brain can think of. From the greatest inventions to the greatest disasters, they all emerged from a thought. The only difference between you and any noteworthy person from history is that you keep saying it’s not your job to go get the shopping carts from the parking lot while they say okay what can I learn from this.
Experts say that the key to a long life is as simple as taking a different route home. “That’s all I gotta do? Shit sign me up. I’m all about taking the scenic route anyway”. Throw in a balanced diet, some stretching, a few selfless acts and decent sex and you’ll probably live to 100. If you want that of course - you can also lay waste to that big brain by consuming the garbage that comes from the people that are doing Stacey’s job. We all have a role to play on this earth. At the end of the day the choice is yours to make. Take a chance at life, make a calculated risk. In the words of the great Paul Atreides, “Fear is the mind killer”.
